For a long time I would think that what happened to me was my fault. That I must of done something to encourage him, or said something. I lived with this for a long time before realising that it isn't my fault at all.
The fault lies with him, he is the one that is at fault, I didn't do anything or say anything to encourage him. It was him who decided that he would do what he did and abuse the friendship and trust I had in him. He was the one that swindled his way into our family and then betrayed our trust by raping me not once but twice and then making me think that it was my fault and I had asked for it.
In the last year I have learnt so much about him that I never knew, he is a predator, a pedophile, a liar and a nasty man. He swindled his way into other families and hurt them as well. All the hurt that he has put on his victims is his fault not ours. What he did to us we have to live with forever, yes we may eventually put it in the back of our heads and lock it away but we know its always there and that anything can trigger it and open it all up again. Thanks to him we no longer feel safe and no longer trust as we used to.
I found out the other week that he is looking to appeal his sentence, he thinks he got too long, well I think he didn't get long enough and if he does go ahead with the appeal, I hope they give him longer or leave it as is. He doesn't deserve less time he deserves more time and lets hope they see it that way.